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x_magikOh, bloody hell, all right. If it will get you all to stop harrassing me, or siccing your dubiously-qualified instructors on me in the case of those of you who don’t have the intelligence to figure things out for yourselves (not that I’m surprised), as Professor Xavier has so kindly pointed out it might, I will spell it out in language you might understand.
Yes, I’m a mutant; a teleporter, to be exact. In very untechnical language, I create light circles through which I can travel at will. By ‘at will’, I mean that I am thankfully in control of my powers. By ‘in control’, I mean they only activate when I want them to, and then to my specifications regarding size and entry/exit points. I know it’s terribly out of vogue to know how to use your powers properly, but you’ll just have to live with it, I’m afraid. I’m certainly not going back to the phase where I randomly ended up twenty miles down the plains or on top of a bloody mountain in my bare feet. (Or down the road here, I suppose.)
Furthermore, yes, I know magic. In an equivalent you may understand, if you are one of the very few people here with enough brain capacity to comprehend simple analogy, I have enough magic to power a light bulb for maybe twenty minutes. Then I’d have a hell of a reaction headache, and pass out for twelve hours. If this is sounding familiar to you, it’s because I had a very irritating encounter with a man I am told is an ‘expert’. He very expertly proceeded to give me a migraine. Impressive, I know.
I was going to write a very long and involved post detailing all the ways my having to say this to appease those of you without any sense was ridiculous, but instead, I’ll leave it at this: In spending quality time with the newspaper, I've discovered that there are indeed people in this world who go around doing things that other people don’t like because it’s right and good. They consider themselves morally righteous, and they are convinced that their intentions are pure enough to justify the means to their end. They live by the policy that those who have nothing to hide have nothing to fear, which some of you seem determined to mimic.
They even call themselves friends. Isn't that nice?
Now, if I could please go back to being -- what were the words? -- right, maladjusted and unsocialized without everyone making it so damn complicated?
Yes, I’m a mutant; a teleporter, to be exact. In very untechnical language, I create light circles through which I can travel at will. By ‘at will’, I mean that I am thankfully in control of my powers. By ‘in control’, I mean they only activate when I want them to, and then to my specifications regarding size and entry/exit points. I know it’s terribly out of vogue to know how to use your powers properly, but you’ll just have to live with it, I’m afraid. I’m certainly not going back to the phase where I randomly ended up twenty miles down the plains or on top of a bloody mountain in my bare feet. (Or down the road here, I suppose.)
Furthermore, yes, I know magic. In an equivalent you may understand, if you are one of the very few people here with enough brain capacity to comprehend simple analogy, I have enough magic to power a light bulb for maybe twenty minutes. Then I’d have a hell of a reaction headache, and pass out for twelve hours. If this is sounding familiar to you, it’s because I had a very irritating encounter with a man I am told is an ‘expert’. He very expertly proceeded to give me a migraine. Impressive, I know.
I was going to write a very long and involved post detailing all the ways my having to say this to appease those of you without any sense was ridiculous, but instead, I’ll leave it at this: In spending quality time with the newspaper, I've discovered that there are indeed people in this world who go around doing things that other people don’t like because it’s right and good. They consider themselves morally righteous, and they are convinced that their intentions are pure enough to justify the means to their end. They live by the policy that those who have nothing to hide have nothing to fear, which some of you seem determined to mimic.
They even call themselves friends. Isn't that nice?
Now, if I could please go back to being -- what were the words? -- right, maladjusted and unsocialized without everyone making it so damn complicated?
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no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 09:26 pm (UTC)And hey, it's not like you're the only one who showed up already knowing how to use your powers . . . remind me to tell you sometime about spending three weeks as six perfectly synchronized selves, and falling down every time I tried to walk through a door because four or five of me wouldn't be lined up right and they'd bump into walls. Thirteen was not a fun age to be.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 09:49 pm (UTC)Thirteen. I remember being thirteen. No, it wasn't really a good age for me either. I accidentally 'ported into the river once, which wasn't very fun, not being able to swim and all.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 09:54 pm (UTC)And then the blooper reels that usually play over the credits, I swear to God, look like a live-action Road Runner cartoon, and Jackie's the coyote. How the man ever made it to the age of fifty is beyond me.
Chocolate, fudge ripple, mint chocolate chip, peanut butter swirl, chocolate marshmallow, or strawberries'n'cream?
no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 10:01 pm (UTC)The choice is impressive, but chocolate. Colour me stereotypical.
copycat
Date: 2004-07-19 11:17 pm (UTC)range?
hardly.
Date: 2004-07-19 11:23 pm (UTC)Range? Anywhere I want.
Not that I've experimented very much here. But I can do about three thousand kilometers (land-wise) without much trouble, by my reckoning; over that was harder last I checked, but it's not like I have a major interest in intercontinental travel or any reason to practise.
I was teleporting before you!
Date: 2004-07-20 11:52 am (UTC)I've done about 7 miles before. they won't let me go too far...appearantly it is not good when your range is farther than the teleportation teachers'. oops...my bad ;)
In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:08 pm (UTC)They don't let you practice on your own? Why not?
Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:34 pm (UTC)safety. it wouldn't work to get somewhere and then not get back or end up inside a mountain or something.
Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:37 pm (UTC)You could end up inside a mountain?
That would be fairly bad luck. I see their point.
Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:50 pm (UTC)do you have a radar thing that tells you?
Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:58 pm (UTC)Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 01:21 pm (UTC)Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 01:38 pm (UTC)Re: In -this- dimension, yes, I'll grant you that...
Date: 2004-07-20 01:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-20 09:27 am (UTC)You can't say no this time.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-20 10:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-20 11:19 am (UTC)Stop avoiding this, we need to talk.
...
Date: 2004-07-20 11:40 am (UTC)Re: ...
Date: 2004-07-20 11:44 am (UTC)Re: ...
Date: 2004-07-20 11:52 am (UTC)want cookies? I have more music I want to subject you to!
Re: ...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:48 pm (UTC)I'll come find you when all is said and done and I'm sure cookies will be a must.
Do me a favour...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:06 pm (UTC)Anyway, yes, all right. I'll find you, and we can have a chat, if only because I'm interested in what kind of rubbish Sefton's been feeding you.
Re: Do me a favour...
Date: 2004-07-20 12:43 pm (UTC)